Rising Pain to the Surface
I love massages. I used to get them every week and then life got busy. Few people know this (unless you all have read my bio), but I am a licensed Asian Bodywork Therapist, and was a practicing practitioner before fitness took over my career. It is one of the moving components that placed me in the field of fitness. So I understand the importance of touch. I know how important touch is for survival, for healing, for happiness and feel connected, it is really difficult for someone like me to have very limited contact.
I found that when I lived in Ahmedabad, it was essential to get one every week. Not because my muscles were sore, (in fact, massages suck here) the idea of real muscle manipulation is nonexistent, but just to be touched. Touched - have physical human contact.
Since moving to Mumbai, since my divorce, since I basically emotionally and mentally shut down I had not not taken a massage, except for right after the Tel Aviv Half Marathon. Fully aware your body can physically manifest emotional pain, I was not prepared for what I was about to receive this week when I decided after a huge week of disappointments to get a massage.
Normal and nothing exciting from the typical oil me up and stroke your hands all over me to give me better circulation and miss manipulating my muscle was all that was happening for the first 15 minutes of this rub down. Annoyed at the fact that the therapist's phone was on vibrate and kept going off, I was almost ready to just stop the massage right there, but then something happened to my body. I hadn't felt this way since I had gone to school and was studying Shiatsu. A shift...a shift of energy in my body which suddenly released a continuous paining sensation every place she touched.
When you think of pain in a massage, most associate to sore spots and muscles. NO...this was deep penetrating pain all surfacing to every place her hands made connection to my flesh. It was awful, it was amazing. It hurt, it felt good. I wanted her to stop, but keep going. It was one of those defining moments; it was The Shift. It had come to surface. The entire massage hurt as the deep seeds of pain from the root of my soul surfaced to the edge of my skin.
Things come to you when you least expect, but also when it was meant to be. I had felt over the past month that my body was going through a shift emotionally, physically, spiritually. I have spent hours exercising and reading. I have felt my body on the verge of this movement. The movement which will take me through the next phase of my life.
Like I said in my writing on the Giving Tree, the Caterpillar is ready to fly ~ I felt like the cocoon started to unravel in that massage.
When I got up this morning I took the time to nurture my soul. Working to regain my since of Being. I had not taken the time to meditate in a long time, as thirty minutes when by in a flash. I hadn't done Reiki on myself for quite a while too, feeling my energy come alive gave me a since of peaceful excitement I hadn't felt in a very long time. Felt alive...truly felt the vibration of life, of existence.
Food for the Soul: What kind of Nurturing are you doing for your Being? It is something you do on a daily basis or only when something is wrong and in crisis?
It is easy to lean to caring toward the physical side of our Self, or just the mental. But taking the time to nurture the mind, body and soul takes a practice. It can come in many different forms, but for Total Health...Total Fitness (look for those words again in Wednesday's post) it takes a full circle. It takes a LIFESTYLE. It is a lifestyle one must NJOY to maintain.
Take the time to discover what is your NJOY LIFESTYLE.